Nirmala, the administrator, looked up with a smile. She was an middle aged lady with a big kum-kum on her forehead and tightly tied hair. Nirmala was sitting on an wooden table, another relic of the bygone era and a big wooden chair with only 2 pillows for comfort. The visitor had to adjust on a similar old wooden bench with no back support. Nirmala recognized the young lady immediately, 'You are here to meet Mrs Murthy, isn't it?'.
The young lady was surprised. 'You have a sharp memory. I am coming back after almost 4 months, I have been here only a couple of times. '
Nirmala protested 'Don't flatter my memory. It is only seldom that we get such a beautiful visitor. It stays in mind.' And with this Nirmala waved at the attender and ordered 2 cups of tea. 'You are here at the wrong time. Mrs Murthy does not like her siesta to be disturbed. The age makes them very excitable, you know.'
The young lady was not in a hurry. She could wait for an hour.
The tea arrived and served. With the first sip of a very sweet tea Nirmala spoke, "I thought you were no different than so many others who come to visit these old people. Just to satisfy their conscience. They visit the old people a couple of times. But the concern is not genuine. They soon forget them and arrive only when everything has ended. Just to make a show of things.' Bitterness was evident on the face of Nirmala. Managing an old-age home was not for weak hearted. Death was more than reality here.
Nirmala continued "You look too young to be her daughter."
The young lady replied 'I am not her daughter nor I am like the relatives you mentioned. Its a long story, if you are interested.' Nirmala had nothing to do that afternoon, and so the young lady went back some 30 odd years.
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'Maya Murthy was a young girl then, neither too intelligent nor too beautiful. She had just finished her graduation and was depressed. It was almost a year since her parents were searching for a match for her. But all the proposals were going nowhere. She felt that she deserved much better than what was being offered. Maya was the only daughter of Mr. Shridhar and Sunanda Murthy, a typical middle class couple. Shridhar was a government servant and Sunanda, a house wife. Shridhar and Sunanda themselves were getting frustrated with the whole match-making process. It seemed like searching for a needle in a haystack. They did not know it, but the wheels of fortunes were turning.
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Maya and Kumar got married in December. It was an almost fairy tale marriage, the preparations were perfect, the food was excellent. Shridhar had a sort of worried look on his face. People attributed it to tensions of getting daughter married. But few guessed that the reasons ran deeper than that.
Kumar, an engineer working in US was a dream match for Maya. When the proposal came, Shridhar approached it with caution as the proposal seemed too good to be true. But after couple of meetings, everybody including the boy and the girl gave their consent. Shridhar felt comfortable with the family and the discussions progressed smoothly until the familiar issue of dowry cropped up. Unexpectedly Kumar's family asked for more dowry than what Shridhar was prepared for. Shridhar was not shocked because of the demand. Rather he was shocked that Kumar, whose salary was many times that of Shridhar's should have taken active part in the negotiation. Shridhar had a feeling that Kumar may be too dominating and money minded. He started having second thoughts about the match, it was not too late to cancel the wedding.
Maya, who was swept off her feet by Kumar, was behaving almost like a teenager. She literally could not stop talking about Kumar. She was also the saddest when the blow came. When Maya learnt that Shridhar was having second thoughts, she despaired. Maya wept all night long. Finally Shridhar and Sunanda, unable to see her plight, took a decision with a heavy heart; they decided to borrow money for the first time in their life. With the borrowed money and along with every scrap of saving, Shridhar arranged for the dowry and the wedding expense. But it turned out to be a wise decision in the end. Kumar and his family were at their best and did not create any more trouble. Shridhar was soon an object of envy for his friends and family for having found such a great match.
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Time flew. Soon it was one year since the tearful farewell was give to Maya at the airport. Those initial days were the best for the Murthy's as they enjoyed the glamour which came with daughter living abroad. The talk in their household always revolve around 'Maya and her experiences' in those days. However the joy turned sour when they realized it will be long before they can meet Maya. Maya had informed that they could not travel to India at end of one year and that they would be missing the festival. It was the most important festival where son-in-law is the guest of honor. Sunanda was aghast. She started suspecting that all was not well between Maya and Kumar. When asked, Maya was elusive. But Shridhar had a suspicion that expenses incurred by Kumar during and after marriage were the real reason. Shridhar felt that he himself would have done the same thing, save money even if it meant giving up petty joys. Shridhar consoled his wife. Kumar's stature in the eyes of Shridhar went up considerably.
But all came down when, in one of the phone calls, Maya excitedly told them of the newly purchased car and explained the features in detail. She was too excited to realize the 'sadness' at the other end of the phone. However hard Shridhar tried to explain this phenomenon, he failed to convince himself. He could not think of a convincing reason which could justify replacement of a 3 year old 'ancient' car at the cost of meeting the parents.
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The end of second year was a time of joy. Earlier that year Maya had joined a local bank. With the double income, said Maya, they could afford a trip to India every year. This plan was also executed successfully. With arrival of Maya, Sunanda could not contain her happiness. What excited Sunanda even more was the silently announced news that Maya was expecting. The prospects of becoming a grandmother made Sunanda almost dance around the house. The spirit was dampened a little when she realised that Maya would be having the baby in the US. Maya had asked for Sunanda's help. Sunanda was skeptical as it not only involved traveling alone to US, but also because Shridhar would be left alone at home, the first time in their 25 years of marriage. A little cajoling and emotional blackmailing by Maya was sufficient to convince Sunanda. A compromise was reached that Sunanda would stay in US only till the child was 3 months old. Maya happily agreed.
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Tara was a silent child since her birth. She never cried much and had a kind of satisfied look on her face. This amazed everybody. Her grandmother, Sunanda, was pampering her from day she came back from the hospital. Sunanda was taking care of Tara as Maya was not adept at handling the baby. What worried Sunanda was that Maya was not even interested in learning and was happy letting Sunanda take care of the child. After some nagging, Sunanda had given up on Maya thinking that Maya will have learn to take care of the kid, once Sunanda leaves. Tara's third month-birthday was approaching and Sunanda was looking forward to going back home, although going afar from Tara made her sad.
Shridhar on the other hand was suffering, although this fact was happily omitted during their weekly phone calls. He was missing the daily comforting talks, her cooking and although he hated to admit it, her very presence. It was easy to get depressed when alone. The first few days after Sunanda left were easy for Shridhar as he was invited for dinners and lunches by his many friends and family. Time passed very quickly as social interactions eased the lonelyness. But soon Shridhar was forced to decline the invitations as he felt he was intruding too much on the hospitality. He started cooking on his own and soon realised it was not an easy task. He soon got bored of cooking. However he also realised that his age was catching up and that he could not digest restaurant food too often. He started eagerly waiting for Sunanda to return.
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It all started with a phone call from Maya's boss asking her to join back the job immediately. He had canceled the remaining three months of leave. Maya felt that only option will be to resign. This had put Maya and Kumar in a fix. They were discussing about hiring a Nanny to take care of Tara. And Kumar was worrying about the cost. And this was the reason why Maya had once again cajoled Sunanda into extending her stay. But all this was not known to Sunanda when Maya had desparately declared her inability to look after a 3 month old child if Sunanda returned according to the plan. Maya said that she was worried that Tara would suffer. This pushed Sunanda into considering to extend her stay.
Sunanda took the decision to extend her trip with a heavy heart. Sunanda was worried of Tara as she genuinely felt Maya was not capable mother. This tilted the matter in favour of Sunanda staying. As a formality Shridhar's permission was taken, but Sunanda knew that Shridhar could never refuse her request. It was only after Maya joined back, that Sunanda realised the real reason. The plan of hiring Nanny was never acted upon.
The day Sunanda decided to stay on in US, Shridhar slept hungry. He did not feel like cooking nor going out. He spent the next day in the bed, eating biscuits and drinking milk. It took him more than a week before he came back to behaving normally. Shirdhar had lost many kilos from his otherwise healthy frame by the time Sunanda returned.
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Fast forward 5 years. Shridhar had just retired and was looking forward to Maya coming home. She had not come home for 3 years now. Some or other reason had pre-empted their plans, but she had assured them that they will surely come this time. They were looking forward to meeting Tara, who was 5 years old now. Although the Maya would not be coming for 2 months atleast, Shridhar had started preparing, first by painting the house and then by cleaning inside out.
Phone rang. It was Maya at the other end. And she had a bad news and a good news. The bad news was that Maya would not be coming. Although it was a disappointment, the reason was that she was expecting again, and doctor had recommended no travel. And Maya wanted her mothers help with the baby. Sunanda was more than happy to help this time. Shridhar had retired and hence neither she had to travel alone, nor he would have to stay alone back in India. Suddenly a flurry of activity started, Shridhar was more excited than Sunanda, for this was his first foriegn visit. He started collecting the bags and had informed half the town of their plans when another phone call changed his plans once more.
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Sunanda boarded the flight alone. Even now she could hear the voice of Maya telling them that Kumar is not able to pay for Shirdhar's ticket. He could hardly manage for Sunanda's travel. She could still see the disappointment in Shridhar's face. And she could still remember the fortnight she had spent trying to decide on whether to go alone. She could not let Maya suffer for mistakes of Kumar. And she was eager to see Tara again. But then Kumar's behavior was unpardonable. On the other hand, after having spend most of the savings for the dowry, Shridhar could hardly afford sponsoring himself. It was Shridhar who resolved the dilemma by asking her to go and help Maya. "We should not let children suffer for the mistake of their parents." And hence she had agreed to travel. All she wanted to was to come back as soon as possible.
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Tara was afraid of all the noise in the house. She chose to hide behind the curtain in her bedroom. Sunanda had become her favorite grandmother. Partly because she had not met any other grandmother but also because this grandmother told lots of stories and prepared all her favorite dishes. And most importantly, she never scolded her. She had gone to a zoo with grand-ma. This was not her first visit to the zoo, but this was her best. Grand-ma had a different story about each animal in the zoo. That moment she had decided that grand-ma should never go back. But today she could see her grand-ma sitting outside in the cold, shivering.
The baby was crying loudly, mother and father were arguing about something,while grandmother was sitting outside in the snow as if the cold could not harm her. Tara was wondering how quickly the house could turn into chaos.
Everything was normal till the evening. The baby was almost one month old now and playing all by itself. Grandmother was in the kitchen preparing something when the phone rang. The phone conversation suddenly turned serious and grandmother lost all the color from her face first and then she lost her cool. Grandfather had been admitted to hospital due to food poisoning.
Sunanda wanted to go back immediately. She pleaded with Kumar to get her tickets of the same day. Kumar said he would check. Sunanda started packing her bags. Outside there was an argument. 'If you are not going to tell her, I am going to.' Maya said. Maya entered the room with a serious face, and tried to convince her mother to stay. When Sunanda tried explaining that she was needed to take care of Shridhar, tempers rose. 'Do you know if you go now, how much the nanny will cost us? We have been planning for this new house for past 5 years. If we hire a nanny now, we cannot buy that house, we cannot afford both the mortgage and the pay. All because of silly emotion of yours.''
Maya banged the door and walked out. Sunanda felt light headed. She sat down on the bed for a moment. And then reality which had eluded her over past few years finally dawned on her. The truth behind Maya was revealed. Maya was never like this. She was putting down a price on husband wife relation. She was putting owning a house in front of need of her father. Maya was not her daughter any more, she had changed . Sunanda walked out of the room and soon out of the house. She sat as if in a trance in freezing cold. Tara watched all this from behind the curtain, peeking. Kumar insisted that Maya apologize to her mother immediately and ask her to come in. Maya flatly refused. Kumar tried to request Sunanda to come in to discuss. Sunanda did not respond. And it was freezing cold outside.
The baby was crying loudly, mother and father were arguing about something,while grandmother was sitting outside in the snow as if the cold could not harm her. Tara was wondering how quickly the house could turn into chaos.
Everything was normal till the evening. The baby was almost one month old now and playing all by itself. Grandmother was in the kitchen preparing something when the phone rang. The phone conversation suddenly turned serious and grandmother lost all the color from her face first and then she lost her cool. Grandfather had been admitted to hospital due to food poisoning.
Sunanda wanted to go back immediately. She pleaded with Kumar to get her tickets of the same day. Kumar said he would check. Sunanda started packing her bags. Outside there was an argument. 'If you are not going to tell her, I am going to.' Maya said. Maya entered the room with a serious face, and tried to convince her mother to stay. When Sunanda tried explaining that she was needed to take care of Shridhar, tempers rose. 'Do you know if you go now, how much the nanny will cost us? We have been planning for this new house for past 5 years. If we hire a nanny now, we cannot buy that house, we cannot afford both the mortgage and the pay. All because of silly emotion of yours.''
Maya banged the door and walked out. Sunanda felt light headed. She sat down on the bed for a moment. And then reality which had eluded her over past few years finally dawned on her. The truth behind Maya was revealed. Maya was never like this. She was putting down a price on husband wife relation. She was putting owning a house in front of need of her father. Maya was not her daughter any more, she had changed . Sunanda walked out of the room and soon out of the house. She sat as if in a trance in freezing cold. Tara watched all this from behind the curtain, peeking. Kumar insisted that Maya apologize to her mother immediately and ask her to come in. Maya flatly refused. Kumar tried to request Sunanda to come in to discuss. Sunanda did not respond. And it was freezing cold outside.
It was Tara who called the 911. Soon the paramedics arrived and helped Sunanda. She was taken to a local hospital where a social worker gave her shelter for the night. Kumar booked the tickets for the next day. Sunanda never returned to Maya's home. She went directly to India without meeting Maya. Shridhar's health had improved considerably by the time Sunanda reached India. But he still needed care.
Maya did not speak to Sunanda till Shridhar's death which occurred few years ago. Sunanda had not pardoned herself for deserting (in her own words) Shridhar when he needed her most. After Shridhar's death, Maya did not come to meet her mother. She tried talking to Sunanda over phone but Sunanda refused. As for Tara, the image of her grandmother sitting in cold stayed with her although she never again talked to her grandmother. She was her favorite grandmother forever.
A couple of her nieces and nephews offered her to come stay with them, but after what she considered betrayal of her own daughter, any offer of help was looked upon with suspicion. Afraid of living alone, she finally decided to move into this old-age home.
Nirmala smiled knowingly, "And so she continues staying here, may be till the end." Although Nirmala was smiling, her eyes were fixed far away. They definitely looked sad. This story had a deja-vu factor, almost every person in this home had a story, a sad story.
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Just then Sunanda entered the room, having been informed by the attender. She was smiling. The young lady concluded, "Now to answer your question, I am not her daughter", she held her arms out towards Sunanda, "I am her grand-daughter. And I have come back to take care of my grandmother. She will be living with me from now onwards."
It was for the first time in many years of managing the old age home, that Nirmala experienced the joy of saying goodbye with a genuine smile.
